CardboardowI's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[Draculas castle loop]

looping point could be better

I think you could extend it a bit, its pretty short even for a loop. And you could make the loop point it self a bit more interesting instead of just cutting it off.

Genraltweet responds:

Thanks the the review! This wasn't very planned out, I only have FL studio trail so it doesn't allow me to save my work and I didn't want to loose this forever because the main melody I thought was pretty good.

[Forever is Never]

Could use some quality improvements

The actual song itself isn't too bad, however the quality of sound you are getting leaves much to be desired. I especially don't like the first instrument you use to establish chords. it gets old fast, and doesn't really match which the rest of your orchestra-ish instruments.

I also find that the song doesn't really build up too much. it would help if you could create a bit more tension to resolve, it would make it more interesting. As of right now it's kind of reptitive and has no direction after you introduce all the instruments.

If you just added a high point to the song in the middle somewhere it would help alot. it's not that the song is bad it just feels like it's not a full song. stuff is missing.

Not good yet, but you are onto something.

6.5

SatanPown responds:

Thanks for the advice. I'll work with it. And finally someone who agrees that it is repetative.

Im new to composing so this helps a lot.
Thanks heaps

[Heroes March (Extended) ~P~]

Good work.

I can definitely picture the story you detailed in you description.

I only wish you had a real ending instead of a fade out, with a big hoorah you know?

other than that I enjoyed it.

[Follow Me - Maize]

Chill.

I'm normally not into ambience music like this but this is a very good, chill, relaxed beat.

The only thing i don't really like is the beep that jumps octaves. kind of annoying.

Other than that, good work.

[Friday Night Lights]

heheh

I clicked on it and started listening, and at first i was like "this isn't exactly a friday night light, it's more like a club," then i read your description

as far as getting past that description, it's a decent song. it's just repetitive. REALLY repetitive. I mean i know it's club music, but you could definitely have a bit more variation in there, the song has the potential to be good if you built it somewhere. Right now it just kind of floats somewhere.

7.5

codbarley responds:

I was really focusing more on the mixing aspect. I wanted the perfect club sound, I payed less attention to the composition than i normally do :/

[F-Zero: Mute City (demo)]

too busy, needs some balance

The song itself is pretty good I just think you need to work on some balance.

The synths that are running the whole time are a bit loud in comparison and I think they could be toned down a bit. It's like they are competing with the rest of the song rather than complementing it.

The orchestra hits are cool but good be made a bit more interesting with dynamic diffrences as well, and the melody itself if left alone should be changing instruments or have a bit better quality going for it or something. I mean, this song is redone alot and im sure you want to stand out.

Drums are pretty good tho.

Cam3leon responds:

True true. I am still in the process of mixing it, but the synths are pretty overwhelming. The main melody's gonna have different instruments throughout, plus I'm throwing in a F-Zero Climax-inspired mix in there eventually. But yeah, thanks for the suggestions/feedback. I'll keep all that in mind.

[Phantom Rising]

Make a choice

The beeps that you have responding to the melody dropped out when they could have stayed in and the little melody line feels a bit off, it doesn't really sync up with the drums.

Could use a bit of dynamic growth on the melody as well.

[Non Descripto]

Random

I think you could make ur rhythm a bit more organized and really get something together that could make people tap their foot. as of now its just too random, kind of funny, but it could be better.

The bell melody is a little lack luster as well.

You could use some dynamic level differences in this, especially in the base, it's pretty repetitive.

Needs more direction. right now its just floating randomness

overall it's ok, but could be better. wouldn't really download it.

jkap1 responds:

I appreciate the specifics. This was the first tune I ever made with Logic, and TBH the squeaks and synth sounds were made when I accidentally copied the drum pattern onto the wrong track & was like "derrrr, hey that actually sounds kinda cool." You're right about the dynamics too. Thanks for the constructive feedback.

[X-Dream - Supernova Remix]

Dirty.

Rough and heavy. If you like that sort of thing ok, but personally I think you could make the same music sound better if you smoothed it out and turned down the kicks a bit.

melody has potential.

X-Dream responds:

I agree on lowering the kicks. Smoothed it out already EQ'ed my ass off. It's clear.
Thanks for dropping an review!

[M.A.2_The Voyage Continues]

needs meat

This whole song feels like the frame work for a real song thats not really there.

Your main "melody" which you repeat over and over is largely stepwise, rhythmically even and uninteresting until about 3 :15.

It largely improves after that point, however it's still missing somethings.

As of right now, the song feels largely ambient, without a very solid direction.
It feels like it's building towards something that never really comes.

The reason for this is the song never really changes much stylistically except for that change around three minutes so it feels like it's all "one part" of a song, rather than a whole song itself.

Try changing the instruments that the main melody is played on, make the melody a bit more complex or add a bit of effects to the mix.

There's also very little tension and resolution going on. most of the piece is simply fluttering around, and feels like a collection of sounds rather then a single piece.

Creating points of tension can help create direction.

Also, you add intensity to your background stuff that's going on, which is fine, but yo rarely give the melody the attention it deserves. if you are changing up the other parts and making them more intense/interesting, you end up listening to that stuff more rather than the main line. it takes away from the drive.

I have a couple more things i could touch on but i dont want to say TOOOO much.

To give a VERY brief summary of what i said:

The best part of the piece is from 3:15 until the fade out. You need to make the rest of the song like this, with drive and melody, rather then ambiguity and repetition.

Ignyte responds:

Finally a real review!
for that alone I thank you.

In my description of the song I did point out that the song was lacking.... something.
which is quoted here.
"Also, this song seems to have a lack of.... "Flavour" or "Depth" whatever it is, I cant figure out how to fix it, however the lack of this depth or flavour is really getting to me.
Can anyone notice this lack in the song?"

I really have no idea what to do in order to add more, without actually over cluttering the song. which, I can tells its already borderline clutter.

umm, in terms of the rest of the review I.E. Lack of tension, and resolution.
I'm slowly working my skills upwards, as I still consider myself very amateur at composing.

As for the main melody that is repeated over and over again, is because this is the continuation of "The Voyage" which is the first song, which started and anded with the same melody but reversed.
thats the whole reason for the voyage, its to set the stage with the use of a highly reverberated piano tune.

I might try to add a little more, or fiddle around with a few of my effects to try and add more depth, and try to make a clear melody.

Thanks alot for a reall in-depth review! It is really appreciated!